All I want for Mother's Day...

One of the local news channels recently did a Facebook poll to ask what ladies would like for Mother's Day.  Can you guess what the overwhelming majority asked for?  I bet you can!  A clean house.  No kidding.  I think there is a feeling among fathers and children that Mom is joking when she says she wants "a clean house" or "everyone to get along" (I'm sure that's a close second!).  So let me clear things up a little.

We are not being noble or self deprecating when we ask for things that cost no money.  We do not secretly mean, 'I want a diamond bracelet'.  We honestly, truly, passionately desire the clean house and peace.  If you really want to find some hidden meaning in this humble request, we could be more specific by saying, "I want a clean house that I didn't have to clean myself."

Men, think about your job.  Whatever kind of work you do, chances are you go to work (even if "work" is one room in your home) and you have tasks and projects set before you.  Whether the job is done or not, when it's time to go home, you go home.  (I know sometimes you work late, but when you go home you're done.  That's the point I'm making.  Stay with me here.)  And, while you may think about your project, you can't really do much about it until you go back in the morning, so it's fairly easy to push it to the back of your consciousness.  And, when the project is done.... wahoo!  Look at this fantastic thing that I have completed.  What satisfaction--and sometimes positive recognition--is yours as you look at this wonderful work you have accomplished.

Contrast this with the work of a stay-at-home mother.  Putting aside the fact that mothers are primarily responsible for taking little monsters that arrive in our homes unable to walk, talk, or feed and dress themselves (or use a toilet!) and turning them into productive, moral, intelligent, independent contributing members of society--with good grades and eagle scout awards and soccer trophies, etc, etc, etc... (AH!) our job as home-makers is to make our homes clean, orderly, and pleasant places to be.  This presents a few problems.  First of all, our tasks are never completed.  As soon as the dishes are "done" someone gets hungry and dirties a dish.  The laundry is never finished.  (Unless you are a family of nudists, in which case you still have sheets and towels to wash.)  As soon as the windows are washed, the toys are picked up, or the counters wiped, someone comes along with grubby fingers to mess it all up.  So, we do the same mundane tasks over and over and over and over again... but it's never done.  Can you comprehend the frustration and anxiety this causes?!?  And, the worst part of it all is that we never leave.  When we decide to call it a day and crash on the couch for a little mind-numbing television, our unfinished projects and dirty dishes are staring at us from across the room.  Mocking our daily efforts to make a dent in the chaos.

The basic point of all this is, as a Mother I am constantly feeling like I have failed at my job.  And, because I rarely leave my job, my failure is constantly right in front of me.  So, when Mother's Day rolls around, and we ask for a clean house, I guess what we're really asking for is to feel like a success for one day out of the year.  I guess there is a hidden agenda after all.